April 15, 2014 Groundwood Books

Mr. Bunny’s Lament [an Easter guest post by Polly Horvath]

Mr. and Mrs. Bunny at home.

Mr. and Mrs. Bunny at home.

Mr. Bunny has always felt two ways about Easter: It is a lovely, pastel-colored holiday, full of good things to eat. It is when Mrs. Bunny loses her mind crafting.

One spring day as Easter approached, Mr. Bunny decided to scuttle Mrs. Bunny’s crafting mania by taking her on a mini-holiday in the Smart Car. They were driving along admiring the wildflowers and cherry blossoms when they hit a pothole. There was a large clanking sound from the trunk of the car.

“Oh dear,” said Mr. Bunny, whose knowledge of cars was second to everyone’s. “Is it the snozzlefizzlehelpfickit or the tenderlin I hear rattling back there?”

“It is neither,” said Mrs. Bunny as they stopped and examined the trunk. “It’s my craft basket.”

“You brought it with you?” demanded Mr. Bunny. “On a little pre-Easter jaunt? Do you not know that it was to save you from the relentless making of wooden eggs and such that Mr. Bunny has spirited you away?”

“What would Easter be without my crafts?” asked Mrs. Bunny irritably. “But never mind, I see you have not in the least ruined my supply of dried flowers, plastic pastel eggs, my Easter bonnet ribbons and bows, my pastel paint set, my wooden baskets, my reeds to weave my own baskets, my paper to shred and color, my mini herb garden in emptied egg shells, my jelly bean mountain, my…”

“Please, Mrs. Bunny,” said Mr. Bunny, “I beg of you, throw it all out before the mania takes hold! Throw it all in the … well, you might just hand over the jelly bean mountain…”

“Here,” said Mrs. Bunny, passing him as many as she thought were good for him.

“Two?” said Mr. Bunny in disappointment. “And not even a black one?”

“With jelly beans you must take what you get and wait for the Easter Bunny, the finest bunny of them all, to appear.”

“But…” protested Mr. Bunny, “I have yet to be visited by any such rabbit.”

“Well, he only appears to very good bunnies,” said Mrs. Bunny. “I have to tell you that every year.

“ Bah!” said Mr. Bunny. “I don’t believe in your Easter Bunny tales.  I think it’s all a hoax.”

“He always brings Mrs. Bunny a fine basket,” said Mrs. Bunny smugly.

“So you say,” said Mr. Bunny grumpily swallowing his green jelly bean. “I suspect you buy it yourself at the drugstore while pretending to be visited by such a mythical holiday-crazed rabbit.”

“Well, what DO you believe in?” asked Mrs. Bunny.

“Cake!” said Mr. Bunny.

“Well, then, Abracadabra,” said Mrs. Bunny and pulled from the bottom of the trunk an assortment of egg-shaped Easter cakes, hardly crushed at all by her craft supplies.

“Now that’s more like it,” said Mr. Bunny brightening visibly.

There was a peaceful quiet as Mr. Bunny crammed his mouth with them.

Mrs. Bunny did so know how to make a holiday sing. There’s no reason why you can’t be saintly and sparkly, she said to herself and hot-glue-gunned a few sequins to her latest bonnet creation.

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If you would like to spend your Easter with Mr. and Mrs. Bunny, check out Mr. and Mrs. Bunny — Detectives Extraordinaire! and Lord and Lady Bunny — Almost Royalty! both written by Polly Horvath and illustrated by Sophie Blackall.

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